- Quotations for the New Year
- Cheers to a New Year and another chance for us to get it right. Oprah Winfrey
- The object of a new year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul. G.K. Chesterton
- Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each New Year find you a better man. Benjamin Franklin
- A New Year Prayer For the Elderly
God, grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones that I do,
And the eyesight to tell the difference.
The good fortune to run into the ones that I do,
And the eyesight to tell the difference.
- A New Year's Wish
On New Year's Eve, Marilyn stood up in the local pub and said that it was time to get ready. At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living.
Well, it was kind of embarrassing. As the clock struck - the bartender was almost crushed to death.
- A Bad Dream?
Jemima was taking an afternoon nap on New Year's Eve before the festivities. After she woke up, she confided to Max, her husband, 'I just dreamed that you gave me a diamond ring for a New Year's present. What do you think it all means?'
'Aha, you'll know tonight,' answered Max smiling broadly.
At midnight, as the New Year was chiming, Max approached Jemima and handed her small package. Delighted and excited she opened it quickly. There in her hand rested a book entitled: 'The meaning of dreams'.
